We all want to know that we don’t suck, that we’re noticed, that we’re capable, that we’re heard, that we’ve made someone’s life better, that we’ve done something great. You certainly don’t need it to determine your self-worth, but it still makes you feel good to hear someone else say it. And hey, if we’re honest, not everyone has that internal voice shouting, “You are awesome.” Those people need you to say it on their behalf even more.
Go on and admit it, it’s nice to receive an honest compliment no matter who you are.
How often do you hear when you’ve done something great? And really, how often do you say it, or even notice, when you see good things going on around you?
Over the weekend, my sister Lyndsey and I were talking about a physician that called her boss and told him how she had gone above and beyond to help his patient. Now, any of you who know Lyndsey aren’t surprised in the least that she would go above and beyond for someone. That is just her. This particular physician isn’t typically someone who notices support staff. In fact, he’s often quite dismissive, so that he noticed and made sure to say so had a huge impact on her.
Two minutes out of his day to make a phone call, such a little thing, made her feel fantastic. I encouraged her to turn around and do that for someone else. Then, I thought maybe I should take my own advice.
My six year old enjoys knowing that we think he’s done a great job on his schoolwork. Dave needs to hear more often that I notice all of the little things he does for me and how much I admire how hard he works for his family. The vice principal at Finn’s school greets every child, their parents, and even their younger siblings by name. She should probably know I think that connection she has, it makes a huge difference in the community there. My sixteen year old cousin just raised almost $1100 for JDRF on behalf of her friend, she should know how proud we are of her. And that’s just the start.
I spend a lot of time complaining when I notice something awful. There is a place for that too, don’t get me wrong. The tough truth is I sometimes catch myself in a cycle of being overly critical and recognizing the ugly things more than the good. I am far from Pollyanna most days, but I don’t want to be that cynical, belittling, jackass either. No one likes that person, least of all staring back at yourself in the mirror.
It just takes a conscious thought to fix that.
I am going to notice good things.
And you will.
It doesn't cost you a thing, maybe a moment of time, to acknowledge it and tell someone that they are fabulous.
So, I challenge you to do that this week, tell five people that you notice. Who is going to be first on your list?
I was just thinking about this yesterday. As soon as someone does something wrong, we look for judgement, and yet the (expected) good things go unnoticed. Your post came at the perfect time (for me) because I had just decided that I would start to praise more than criticize.
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking about this a lot lately. Sometimes I feel like I am that cynical jackass, and it doesn't feel so good. It's really easy to notice, and comment on, the negative. But I do want to make the conscious effort to notice, and comment on, the positive! I had just been thinking about my son and how much positive impact his high school marketing teacher and baseball coach (he's an amazing guy that does amazing work with the kids) had on him and decided I would email him and let him know! Not only does offering a little praise make the person being praised feel good, it makes us feel good, too!
ReplyDeleteNot very long ago, I had to go shopping b/c I was taking a fun trip to Cedar Point. I went to our local mall and ended up spending a pretty penny at Maurices. I was in need of pants... I don't do shorts and I knew this was going to be a task. A task on a normal day for any woman, but throw three kids under 5 into the mix and it's a sure fire disaster. However, the sales associate was fantastic in helping me, bring me clothes, entertaining the kids. In my opinion, she went way above and beyond. I wrote a quick email to the company, mentioning her by name and explaining my experience. They didn't just respond, but they called me to verify what I was telling them b/c they never really receive positive feedback. It's so sad how quick we are to point fingers, and blame others and focus on the negative. If more people focused on the positive, this world may just be a touch better!!!! I hope all your readers take your advice and point out the positive to at least 5 people. It's really much easier than people think!!!!
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Michelle! Thank YOU for the reminder to notice all the good in life.
ReplyDeleteGreat positive post :-) telling someone what fabulous things not only will make the other persons day, but it will also make you feel good too!
ReplyDeleteGosh, if more people would do this! I mean, yeah, life isn't always a bed of roses and sometimes we wallow in the junk but if we could just put our focus more on the GOOD in this world so much could change. Thanks for reminding of that. :)
ReplyDeleteWow, this post really touched me . . . I try to live my life focusing on the positive but sometimes the bad stuff creeps in when you least expect! I love receiving a compliment or kind word . . . we as a society really do need to praise more often. Thank you for the reminder!
ReplyDeleteYou are right! I am a teacher & I see good things happening all the time! I am going to mention them more. After my wedding & honeymoon, I did write a few thank you notes that weren't really "necessary" to people who rally went above & beyond for us. It felt really good to do that because, you are right, people rarely do that. Thanks for the reminder!
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