I Fired My Doctor.

I will preface this post with:  I am not dying.  This was written a bit ago and everything, everything turned out wonderfully.

I was seeing a specialist, in fact the only person in the city {and we’re not in a small town by any means} in that specialty.

At the first appointment it was split into two parts, we waited a half an hour for the first part and another forty-five minutes for the second part.  So if you’re counting the second part of the visit was actually an hour and fifteen minutes after it was supposed to be. 

And I was tired and pissed, but I tried to be understanding that this is a specialist and emergencies pop up, right?

And then I had questions that on the surface seemed pretty simple, but couldn’t be answered.  And their waiting room was like a poster child for every white trash person in the city and reeked of cigarette smoke and weird smells.  And my gut… my gut kept telling me that this was WRONG. 

I shrugged it off and thought maybe I was being an elitist asshole because I didn’t feel well.  I kept chalking it up to nerves which in retrospect, was really really stupid of me. 

I was researching everything online too, talking to other patients, reading medical journals, learning what technology is available, what is normal and what is not and things, they didn’t make sense to me.  And statistics he quoted me, things he actually wrote down as fact didn’t make sense and seemed off from what I was reading.  Off by a lot.  Statistics that shouldn’t be off at all when making decisions about which route to take with my medical care.  Did I mention that he ‘suspects’ {and also wrote that down} that I was a type 2 diabetic even though um, I explained to him I’ve had actual bloodwork done to rule that out and I’m not.  And if you haven’t gathered from all that, he wasn’t really listening when we were having a conversation.  He was talking at me because, I believe he is a pompous fucking asshole.  Ahem.  That is beside the point.

But, this is a specialist and specialists know everything, right?  He is after all the only one in the city.

And then after stewing and freaking out for two weeks, they cancelled an outpatient procedure with less than 24 hours notice due to the doctor’s scheduling conflicts.  I scheduled an appointment two weeks prior and with less than 24 hours to go they just discovered the conflict?  The nurse was really flippant about it too, obviously knowing I was going to be upset by the whole thing she started the conversation with, “Well, I’m probably going to rock your world but we have to reschedule,” in a singsongy voice.  Professional, eh?  Never mind the fact that my husband took two days off work and I found a sitter for half a day and you know um, this has been planned for two fucking weeks.

So I thought about it.  I stewed on it.  And I decided that, you know what?  This isn’t acceptable.  It’s NOT ok for me to feel uncomfortable about this, it’s not ok to feel like someone was shouting in my head, “RUN.  RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN.” 

And when I finally was at peace with everything?  The moment I called the nurse {ten minutes after she called to reschedule} and told her that I would absolutely not be back.  Ever.  I outlined exactly why, just in case there were any misunderstandings and she was genuinely shocked that I wasn’t just going along because, you know he’s the only guy in town in this specialty. 

Fuck that, he’s not laying a single hand on me.

And then I called Dave and told him I fired the doctor and he was as relieved as I was… information he probably should have shared with me before hand.

I’d rather drive an hour each way {in snowy winter} to another big town and see someone who makes me feel like I’m making the right choice in putting my health in their hands.  This isn’t something to be light about and I don’t think enough people put enough stock in that.  The new doctor?  They were able to get me in for an appointment the very next day, have the technology that I was looking for, were able to answer questions without pulling out 12 binders and looking for the answer, and came highly recommended... as in have done hundreds of this procedure, not less than fifty.  Did I mention that she has also published many medical journals in her specialty?  She knows her shit and better than that, I trust that when my life is in her hands, it is well protected.  Dave and I don’t even care that she’s out of network and we’re going to have to pay out of pocket for most of it.

I’m worth it.  

Have you ever fired a doctor?