First (Official) Haircut

Oooohhhh Baby Baby.

I can't even believe that my baby cousin is having a baby in October. The M girls drove up from Georgia so we could throw Meghan a shower here. There were games and lots of visiting and funny stories told by all. Flynn Gregg will be such a spoiled boy!

Anyone? Anyone? Anyone?

Dave's party ended up being ridiculously awesome. We celebrated with an outdoor screening of Ferris Bueller's Day Off, complete with movie nachos, candy as far as the eye could see, cupcakes, and a popcorn machine.  My mom's roof downtown provided the awesome backdrop.  Fireworks from Mud Hens stadium were an added bonus to the night... oh, I mean, I ordered those especially for Dave's birthday!

 Happy Birthday Love, I hope you had as much fun as you said you did.

Dave Rules.

There are no words for how much I adore you. Is it bad that I bought your present with your money? Yeah, probably so. Anyway, I hope you have the happiest birthday of your lifetime and that you have many many more to come.

T minus 2 days.

Till Dave's birthday party! Woot. This is a hint of what is to come. Can't wait.

My funny republican (bastard)... errr.... "third party" voter

That Dave sure can crack me up sometimes. We watched Big Brother tonight and then the Democratic National Convention came on the air. Tonights speaker is Hillary.

Dave says, "do you think that Hillary will ask for the power of veto so she can vote Obama out and take the nomination?"

I saw that doggie dog guy, well apparently he raps.

A couple years ago, my mom was in Miami for a builder's convention. She and her friend Gale got to the hotel early and find that it is so packed, it's hard to get in the hotel. She thought it was the convention, but a apparently there is a big concert that night.

So my mom doesn't think anything of it and she decides to go for a run before they go to dinner. When she gets back there are bazillion peeps in the area just outside of the lobby and she can't get through.  She is hot, sweaty, and annoyed.

Then a guy in {her words} "a 1970s shiny, ugly, jogging suit wearing sunglasses" sees her pushing her way through.  He sees her and says, "C'mon in. Hey. Get out of her way. Hi. Did you have a nice run?"

She says back, "Yep. Thanks. Have a nice day," and continues through to the doors of the hotel.

This is the conversation that follows:

Porter 1 - DO YOU know who that is??

Mom - No.

Porter 1 - That's Snoop Dogg.  {D-O-double G, you see.}

Mom - Isn't he the guy from the Lee Iaccoca commercial??

Porter 1 & Porter 2 & Doorman - *hysterical laughter*

Only. My. Mother.

Just got off the phone with my mom... this was the conversation.

me - What's going on?

mom - Just got back from taking the recycling.

me - Oh?

mom - I met some guy from Nine Inch Nails.

me - WHAT????????

mom - Yeah.

me - WHAT?? Seriously? What happened?

mom - I was taking the recycling over. It's at Seagate. So I was throwing bottles in and the security guard came over and asked me how long it would be and I told him however long it took to throw the stuff in. Then I asked him if he wanted to help me so he did. {At this point in my mind I am thinking ok, someone walked by or whatever. But no....} So then this guy walks out of the tour bus and says that he wanted to see who was making all the noise. {I am hyperventilating at this point, please don't let it be Trent, please don't let it be Trent, please tell me my mother didn't just wake up Trent from his nap.} So, I told him it was me and asked if he wanted to help me too. So he said sure.

(SEVERAL MOMENTS OF PAUSE.)

me - ARE. YOU. KIDDING. ME?

mom - no. I didn't know who he was.

me - this is worse than Snoop Dogg. Worse than Snoop Dogg!

mom - what?

me - It didn't occur to you that he was walking out of a TOUR BUS??????

mom - I thought maybe he was a skateboarder or something. There was a skateboard outside the tourbus.

me - Oh. my. god. So then what happened?????

mom - So then he was yapping away for a little bit, I said thanks and left. I stopped at the security guard to tell him thanks and he said, "Mam, do you know who that was??" and I said no. So he told me it was so and so from Nine Inch Nails.

me - Who was it? Mom, was it Trent? Was his name TRENT??

mom - I don't remember. He had brown hair.

me - Jesus.



So mom.... which one of these guys helped you throw your fruitfly filled wine bottles into the recycling bin???????

Time to hit up Goodwill.

Your friendship means the world to me. Thanks for a fantastic afternoon and for being there daily to amuse me. We promise not to laugh (too much) when we're sitting in the ER in Greece.

I'd do it again in a second.

{image courtesy of decisive moment photojournalism}

Love,

I've never been happier in my whole life. I'd happily skip down the aisle to marry you again in a second.

Happy Anniversary.

M.

Salivating.

Boule. Fleur de sel caramels. Nuff said.

I am stupid tired.

{Photo courtesy of: GETTY IMAGES}

I have been up watching the opening ceremony of the Olympics and China did not disappoint. It was a really captivating ceremony.

I love the Olympics. I know this makes me a dork, but there is something all dreamy and idyllic about the entire world coming together and putting all most of their shit aside.

And there is nothing like the electricity in the air during the games. I lived in Atlanta for the summer of 1996 when they hosted the games and I have yet to find any party as big or as far reaching as those that summer. We cooked dinner for the Irish boxing team. We got drunk with people from all over the world. I will never forget waking up to Adam's mom calling, wondering why he wasn't ready for the womens gymnastic competition and making it downtown in completely illegal record time. That night we went to bed at 5 am. We didn't sleep for about 3 weeks. It was a summer unlike any other in my life.

I hope there is a girl in China partying with her friends and making memories that will last her lifetime.

I wish I knew someone obsessed with owls.

I would totally buy this marvelous, wonderful piece for them and then borrow it often.

If you're interested in buying it (and letting me borrow it) you can find it here from Etsy seller birdsNbeez. She has some really lovely things.

Crack whore and 15 guys in the attic.

Dearest Sister:

DO NOT HIDE in the attic with 15 guys and a girl that looks like a crack whore. You will get arrested. After 56:03 minutes on the phone with you, that is all the advice I have.

I love you, but the officer was correct... you are a dumbass. The logic of 17 year old girls astounds me sometimes. I know, aside from being the sister of one, I also coach... I'm around teenage girls more than I like to be.

Here are some signs that you shouldn't be at a particular party, you know, so the next time you'll know. You could fold it into an oragami crane and keep it in your pocket so you don't forget:

1. You have to throw your purse under a bed to keep people from stealing from you. Plus, it just looks shady when you have to dive under a bed in front of a cop to retrieve said purse.
2. The girl next to you looks like a crack whore.
3. You're hiding with an idiot that has a record.
4. There are 60 kids crammed into a house the size of a crackerjack box on a freaking BUSY street.
5. There are 60 kids crammed into a house the size of a crackerjack box on a freaking BUSY street AND THEY ARE DRINKING, did I mention that no one is 21?
6. You have to even consider pulling down a set of stairs and heading into an attic for chrissakes.
7. If there is even a chance your sister is going to hear about you getting arrested the following day at cheerleading practice.

I am not quite sure when I got "old," but seriously, I never got arrested. You are lucky you didn't call Dad because he really would have left your ass to jail for the night. That's right... JAIL. Do you know the shit they do to pretty girls in the clink? They sure as hell don't let you straighten your hair, you'd have a fro in like 10 seconds after getting hosed down and de-liced.

Your Loving Sister,

M.

P.S. THIS is why I love Emily best. She didn't get arrested did she? Ummm no.

Whomever has an extra $48 laying around...

please get me this GORGEOUS lovely in a 70 inch round from Williams-Sonoma. I would be ever so grateful. I will even invite you over for dinner. It is definitely dinner party worthy.